"Somewhere in a hidden memory..."

All Souls Night by Loreena Mckennitt is a staple in my house at this time of year.  As I sit here listening to it, sipping hot cider, having enjoyed my shortbread cookies and trick-or-treating with the kids, I am reflecting back on the year.  It's been an eventful one.  My husband and I parted ways, I had to face losing my house, figure out how to support myself after years of being a stay-at-home-mother, enrolled in college, finally added a mollosser to the house again, continued to struggle with depression and basically keep my sanity.  Every day is hard.  I am still struggling with the loss of my marriage.

But I am thankful for a lot of things.  It was during this year that I found out just how strong I really am.  I also relied quite heavily on my faith and developed an even deeper appreciation for it, continuing my priestess training.  I found a measure of peace in my heart.  I am not all the way there; things are still restless within me.  But it is no small thing to say that I found some sort of peace.

Samhain is one of my favorite holidays of the year.  The spirits are everywhere.  You can almost hear their voices on the wind.  I often dream of things I believe are part of lifetimes past (hidden memories), and interestingly enough these are the things I end up NOT seeing during my meditations and ritual work on Samhain.  I am very much looking forward to tonight's rite.  The air tonight is crisp and cool and it feels like a good night to cross the veil.  Sending love and light to all my fellow pagans taking part in their own rites this evening and to departed loved ones.  Memories of you are not quite so hidden...